Hey Boy, Like Cows? Actually…

Have you ever foolishly decided not to bother wearing a costume at Halloween? I’ll just go as I am. No need for a costume. No? Thankfully, me neither. However, I do remember two years ago I almost did. Promoting a night in a nightclub on Halloween night. Usually might only be concerned about whether the club was going to be busy or not. However, seeing as it was a banker to be a success, I was able to chill out beforehand. Have a few boozes. Which I think was the reason why myself and two other buddies decided at the very last minute that we’d better wear some sort of costume. Thank holy Jesus we did. Simply for the fact that I remember out of about 800 people in the club that night, there were only three people who weren’t in costumes. Three guys in a group looking absolutely gutted. Standing out like sore thumbs. While my two buddies and I were delighted with our soccer player, chef and priest outfits. What chumps those other three guys were! Close call.

Shiny Gold Buckles

Anyways, since that night I now know that you really do have to dress up for Halloween. More so than any other year, I am pumped for this Halloween. As in pumped! No ordinary Halloween night really. A big one! With that in mind, I decided to invest in a proper costume. Look the part at least. Instead of stringing together bits of odd clothing and people asking what are you meant to be? Yesterday I ordered a costume online. Happy days. Sorted. Good to go. For Halloween 2010. Great call buying stuff at the last minute. Forgetting about delivery times. Realizing that the costume might not arrive in the next two days. Finding out that the earliest it will arrive by is Monday. Monday. Which is after this Saturday. So it will arrive after Halloween. Which is just fantastic work by me. Fantastic.

At least I have next year sorted. Although seeing as I’ve used the wrong address as well for the delivery, the whole affair is a bit of a shambles. Write that little expenditure down as a tax deduction somehow. I was distracted by all the shiny buckle parts on the costume I ordered. Gleefully happy with my choice that I forgot completely about everything else. So now I’m back at square one. Need a costume of some sort. And at this stage it is going to have to be a homemade one. Scrape items together.

As it happens, this week I have been doing the fun task of cleaning out wardrobes, cupboards, shelves and all those fun nooks where you keep endless piles of gibberish style junk. Strangely learning things about myself. Or maybe learning strange things about myself? Besides the usual collection of t-shirts, jeans and jackets, I have found a few weird collections. According to a couple of boxes, I went through a stage of avidly collecting batteries. Old, used, useless batteries. Boxes of them. Great collection. If anyone might want them, let me know. Plastic bags are another fetish of mine it seems. Wide variety of colours. Different handles, some string, others zip-lock, all pointless. Souvenirs of different Duty Free shops I must’ve visited. Can’t throw out that plastic bag! I got that on a great holiday before. The memories attached to that bag are way too good to just dump it! Who cares if it’s ripped and can’t actually be used again! Keep it!

Yee Haw!

From all my autumn cleaning, one thing has become quite clear to me. At various stages throughout my life, it would appear, that, I have wanted to be, a cowboy. At least four separate occasions. I have the hats to prove it. Going by my last purchase, I don’t think it was just an impulse thought either. €40 for a cowboy hat?! That’s not a whim. €5 is a whim. €40 is stupidity. To me, that is properly considering the cowboy look. Thinking it might be worth buying a denim shirt for. Then finding the unopened, unused denim shirt I did buy to go with it. Can’t really remember buying the shirt. Then again I can’t remember why I would want to keep batteries or that I had a plastic bag fetish either. I’ll pretend I was drunk buying it. Ordering it online when I was drunk watching all those Western movies. Oh yeah, I remember that now. Makes sense. Yee haw.

At least I have a fall back option for Halloween. Fulfill my secret desire to be a cowboy. Just me and my cows. Although I did just stumble upon a red top hat as well today. Hats make anything you’re wearing look like a costume. Any way to combine two hats? What are you meant to be? John Wayne? The Lone Ranger? Sounds better than an ape in a red hat. Tough call. Either way, now that I no longer have the shiny gold buckles distracting me, they’re actually both probably way better than the horrific outfit I’ve ordered for next year. Not fully sure if I ordered a leprechaun or a leper costume. What are you meant to be? Maybe a leper in a red hat? Sorted!

Crown On The Ground – Sleigh Bells

Tags: Cleaning, Cowboy, Crown On The Ground, Fancy Dress, Halloween, Leper, Leprechaun, Sleigh Bells, Westerns, Yeehaw