Is That A Puddle? No, Befuddle

Won’t lie. Writing a book. Is. Tough. Kind of like studying. And at the same dumb time, kind of not at all. Kind of like it as in my hours are now completely all over the shop. 6 in the morn appears to be my new time to go to bed. Which is fine. Body is all out of synch during the day though. Whatever part of the day I manage to see. Close enough to getting to where I might never have to bother opening the curtains. Not even too sure what day it is either. Just whether it’s day or night. Another issue I have, my need to justify everything? Why I do it, I do not know. Needs to be culled from the book as well. Cut off that flab!

Studies Show...

With study, there’s kind of an answer you can give to whatever question you’re asked. Here, it’s basically just what you produce. You either get it right. Or it isn’t what you intended. And you’ll be annoyed for life. Ha. Seeing as when I write a chunk, read back over it, then see that is not what I really intended, it’s annoying enough. Head wrecking. Beyond belief. All quantity. Where the funk is the quality?! Fixing it though, and getting it right, is a mighty buzz. Aw yeeeh, moment. Good old kick. Differs from study there really, which was just getting the exam done. Although, maths did make me say aw yeeh back in the day. Which is a great story that I’m sure you’d just love to hear more about.

How Many Dots Do You See?

One thing which was sticking in the back of my mind was being asked how long is it now, how many pages is it now, how many words is it now, how many numbers do you have left to colour in? I can see why they would be asked. However, when I have no clue, I started thinking about it too much. Should I have a clue? Give me a clue. How long is that piece of string? How long should it be? Head wrecking. Wrecking my own head, over and over, is just fantastic. Try it. Personalities splitting all over the place. Different sections taking sides. Body against the brain. Calm down lads, we’re all friends, right?!

All I do know is that I have way too many words, pages, numbers, all of that. A big block. Which needs to be chiseled. I know what my publisher wants. And I know now what I’m now aiming for, to an extent. So maybe they were good questions. Hairs are splitting again. Where am I from where I want to be? Not sure, but I know I’m getting there. Final destination is the target!

Fake It Frankie

All of which made me realise something. Main reason that I’ve been going in and out of states of befuddlement is quite simple… I don’t really know what I’m doing. Ha. Not going to lie. True though. First book. What do I have as guidelines? Nada. I have the blog. But that’s not a book. Different styles. Different needs. Could spend my days, weeks, years reading ‘How To‘ books. Or just do it. So just learning by numbers as I go along. Which can be frustrating when you hit a wall. And mighty when you burst through! Style is on!

All of this was actually meant to be a way of me taking my mind of the book. By writing all about it? My brain works in marvelous ways at times. Although, in it’s defence, I have barely ventured out of the house the past few days. So not much else going on besides in my head. Back DJ’ing in the gym? One venture. Which is as good a laugh as ever. Beyonce remix is their new favourite it seems. Crowds of people doing the dance. Thought it was a flash mob situation at first. Apparently they teach it in a class there though. No flash mob Youtube videos. Re de de. Could’ve been the big break!

Hug It Out? No. Ok

Thought as well that I was getting lined up for a few handy DJ’ing gigs after my hibernation. Some punter in the gym asked for my card. Club owner/promoter. Side salad, I have a card now as well. Buckled. Caved. Sold out! Gibberish business card beyond belief. Anyways, get the call… Hey boss, yeah I remember, gym, you were on about the gi… go for drinks? Pardon? What? What what? About the gigs? Drinks first? Who, me, you and who? Just you and I? Candle lit? Cheers bud, gotta go, must do my laundry. I’ll call you back. Spoofing ape.

Actually, laundry was another venture. Of slight note. Seeing as there was a girl next to me. Of slight hotness. Who seemed to forget to put her dirty jeans into the wash. The dirty ones she was wearing. Took them off. Next to me. Like a Diet Coke ad. And she must’ve forgot that she had forgot something else that day. To wear underwear. Yanked the jeans back up. Looked at me. Laughed an ‘Oh my Gawd!’ Oh golly gosh indeed. Ran off in embarrassment. To her friend. We all had a great laugh about it. Well, her friend turned out to be her boyfriend and they had a good laugh about it. Seeing as I was too busy taking a call from a dude asking me to go for candle lit drinks with him. Wuu.

No more befuddlement… befuddle off! Book on! Songsaruu… First one. If you have it. iTunes. Genius. A mighty playlist should appear!

Bron-Y-Aur Stomp – Led Zeppelin

Over The Edge – The Go Find

Tags: Barriers, Befuddled, Book, Brain, Bron-Y-Aur-Stomp, DJ, gym, Led Zeppelin, Mind Games, Night Owl, Over The Edge, Quality, Quantity, The Go Find, Writing