Tags: America

Hollywood Hayes

Hollywood Hayes – Crazy People

“How long until this person goes crazy on me?” is a fun game I like to play in LA. Usually not too long at all which is why it feels like you’re constantly living on the edge here. Crazy people roaming like zombies. Once met an older, shoeless Gene Wilder looking guy at a coffee
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Hollywood Hayes

Hollywood Hayes – Eviction

So, great news: I’m being evicted. Nice. Got an eviction notice yesterday from my landlord. Happy days. Apparently putting your spare room up on AirBnB while your roommate is away for a few months is frowned upon in West Hollywood nowadays. Even though we were told it was OK. I blame the building manager. Let’s
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Hollywood Hayes

Hollywood Hayes – Sweating

“Mark, can you stop sweating?” Sorry. “You need to stop. It’s showing on camera.” It’s not on purpose. “OK, we’re done here.” Pardon? “Get out.” Auditions are some laugh. In my defence, it was 100 degrees with about 98% humidity. LA is a cauldron. Same again yesterday. Needed to take a photo for this column.
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Hollywood Hayes

Hollywood Hayes – AirBNB

Sorry, I can’t make it tonight, bit of a crack whore situation going on in my kitchen. Hollywood’s some laugh. Let me explain. So my roommate is in London for a few months for work. Decided to rent out his room on AirBnB while he’s gone. Bit apprehensive at first. What if they’re psychotic? Murderers?
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Hollywood Haze

Hollywood Hayes

New weekly column of mine in the Irish Examiner. Read on! COLUMN  So there I was, Sunday night, somewhere in the Hollywood Hills, about three in the morn, drunk as a skunk, debating whether or not to jump out of this moving car. My buddy in the passenger seat, let’s call him Johnny, was debating
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Eye Twitch

Date Ape

Not a fan of dates. Many reasons. Here are a few: So. It’s Christmas Eve babe and I’m not in the drunk tank. Yet. I am on a date though. Christmas. Eve. Babe. What else would you be doing. Eve, the girl I’m on a date with, is looking unreal. Savage dress. Best I’ve seen. Special
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Omerricka!

Hollywood (Felix Da Housecat Remix) – Penguin Prison Off the top of my head I can only think of two things:

Amerricka! Funk Yeah!

Jul 05, 2011Hollywood, Ireland, LA Living, Music, Random Ramblings, Writing0 Comments

I Want To Break Free – Mariachillout Seeing as the rest of America is celebrating its birthday and its right to dance, I feel now is the perfect time to do a quick expose. Show the people of Ireland (et al) the truth! What it’s really like to live in LA. Won’t lie, pre-tty gruesome.
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Two Girls And A Carrot…

Jun 19, 2011Hollywood, LA Living, Music, Random Ramblings, Writing0 Comments

All Together Now – The Farm Ménage à trois. Sounds unreal. Holy grail. Conjures up magical imagery. Hot. Toned. Tanned. Women. Feathers. Candles. Wings. Gloriousness. Fireplaces. Rugs. Cherries. Berries. James Bond bedroom scene style lighting. Saxophones, hooting from somewhere. Kenny G next to the roaring fire, no doubt. Tooting out the soundtrack. Seeing as it
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